015. TGT: The Pursuit of Better _ Kenya Clark – Be Relentless
Episode 15 from The Grit Theory.
Today we sit down with Kenya Clark, a father, soldier, crossfit athlete and an amazing friend. Ken appears to be more Myth & Legend than common man. He has been struck by lightening and can lift inordinate amounts of weight. He perceives boundaries as opportunities and is a humble and all around awesome dude. From PTSD to Radical Acceptance this conversation covers it all. Buckle up and enjoy!
Highlights from our conversation include:
– Experiences with Rhabdomyolysis.
– Operating at 60% (Sickle Cell Anemia).
– Balancing self worth with ridicule.
– Try, Fail, Repeat (you will not know until you try).
– Lack of Skill = Lack of Dedication.
– How you do 1 thing, is how you will do anything.
– Pain is a necessary evil.
– No bad emotions & learning to love.
– Letting go (working through grief, depression, and trauma).
– Chasing Excellence.
– Discipline must be a daily habit.
Remember, a lesser person has done it before, why can’t you?
Ken is currently working transitioning his time from a life of service through the military to serving his community his company TIERED TRAINING. If you would like to learn more about his work, check him out at:
TIERED TRAINING
&
@tieredtraining
Did you find value in today’s conversation? SHARE IT!Â
Also, check out Be Relentless: If the obstacle is the way, then we must be waymakers HERE.
Do you want to learn more? Check out:
The Book: Be Relentless: If the obstacle is the way, then we must be WayMakers.
The Podcast: “Be Relentless Podcast”
The Fuel: Sisu Stamina, Performance Evolved
Linktree: Here.
Episode Transcript
08;06;40;08 – 08;06;32;09
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Well, good morning, everybody, welcome to the grit theory. This is Aaron Robinson along with Jon Mayo, and we are joined by Kenya.
08;06;32;09 – 08;06;31;22
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Clarke.
08;06;31;09 – 08;06;27;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And Ken Clarke. Thank you for joining us this morning.
08;06;26;24 – 08;06;23;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s awesome. It’s beautiful, isn’t it? This is like the spicy.
08;06;22;29 – 08;06;04;07
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Oh, I was just thinking, you can. If you can, is a big dude. And we’re letting him into the ranch today. And I just thought for anybody else, that context would be kind of a scary situation. You pulled up to a gate to and like to say, Largement, I think it’s all.
08;06;04;07 – 08;05;55;05
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s all relative, but open the gate, lock you inside gate with three large dogs greeting you. But I didn’t think you were intimidated at all. Not you.
08;05;54;18 – 08;05;41;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Oh, no. No of those animals are just like they like horses, like a miniature horses. I just ride them. I tried this morning. You didn’t notice any other man would be intimidated.
08;05;40;24 – 08;05;19;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’m glad you can. So, yeah, we’re we’re sitting out here picking your brain today, Ken is does many things is is semi-famous here in Colorado Springs for his indomitable will is his ability to really self challenge this one, particularly in the CrossFit world.
08;05;19;00 – 08;05;11;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
In fact, I was at lunch yesterday and someone who gave us so they thought I was in trouble. I don’t know where it.
08;05;06;13 – 08;05;06;05
Ken, Jon & Aaron
What’s.
08;05;06;05 – 08;05;04;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Going on. Well, he’s not going to.
08;05;02;09 – 08;04;47;16
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Lose Fuller’s communities like full of great people. I mean, I haven’t been to a place where I felt more like included. So I did CrossFit and moving from like gymnastics to basketball track and field sat. No football, I don’t know.
08;04;47;16 – 08;04;32;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s just you’re only as good as the thing you suck at, right? And I kind of hold on to that as much as I can because I know, man, I really suck at burpees and strictness and pushups. So yesterday I did 100 birdies in my district, an when I was like, This is just horrible.
08;04;31;10 – 08;04;26;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And then tell us of the human, it’s all acronyms. And yes, oh yeah.
08;04;25;27 – 08;04;11;12
Ken, Jon & Aaron
We use the IRS prescribed and scaled a cerebral added imam every minute on the minute. And if you want to get really good at a physical pursuit, send an email for like 40 minutes and find out who you are by minute.
08;04;11;12 – 08;04;00;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
22, you’re like, Oh my word, what is this like? I can’t feel my legs, my chest burns. Can I really do this in a minute? But the answer is you can.
08;03;59;17 – 08;03;57;07
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I like it? And that’s the suspicion we have about a.
08;03;57;07 – 08;03;55;22
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Lot of things. And that’s why I’m talking.
08;03;53;29 – 08;03;43;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
To John, John, Matt, can you? You kind of pulled a a self inflicting kind of, Hey, I’m going to discover and see what I made up.
08;03;43;12 – 08;03;24;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Well, I’m always looking for for people crazier than myself. Yeah. And then I’ve been laughing because we met back in 2012 at Fort Carson, but it’s kind of like two ships passing in the night he was. He came in basically as I was transitioning out, so we saw each other and like, smell each other and, you know
08;03;24;06 – 08;03;07;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
, two dogs pass. I guess you’re right to figure is kind of place. And that was it. We shook hands and I got a cool man and kind of did our things, and I laughed and he said, and our romance kind of rekindled today via Instagram.
08;03;07;27 – 08;02;56;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Like so many relationships, we kept commenting on each other’s posts. And then I say, You know what? Forget, I think I saw you do a 300 plus pound snatch, and I was like, I need that in my life.
08;02;56;23 – 08;02;42;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
So I messaged him once the chance you want to come out to the ranch to do a strong training session on Saturday. The response was 100%. When I say, Come up this dude, we did it. That was last Saturday.
08;02;42;10 – 08;02;29;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah. Since two in the hell it was, it was lethargic. It just like it did something for my soul because I grew up on a pig farm and like going out there and like, Oh, he’s like, you sure you want to do this?
08;02;29;23 – 08;02;22;21
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And like, do you have work to be done and you have another person here to stop doing it alone? Let’s just get it done. That’s a great mentality.
08;02;22;21 – 08;02;17;09
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It was so wonderful because it definitively would have taken four hours by yourself. We finished up in about 90 minutes.
08;02;16;27 – 08;02;15;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I don’t have to do to.
08;02;14;09 – 08;01;58;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But real quick, funny story and offensive. So it’s hailing. There’s lightning, there’s thunder. All of this has gone on to kids who come out. You know, you’d hear some that we’d send the kids and then you can just make this comment yourself as your friend saying he’s like, Oh yeah, I don’t play with lightning.
08;01;58;23 – 08;01;40;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I said, Why? But I mean, obviously no one does. But then I kind of sense there’s more to guys like power lines above us. So kind of draw the lightning and he’s like that to us. What’s your relationship advice to kids being struck directly by lightning?
08;01;39;16 – 08;01;33;18
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, it’s not like old cat food and burning hair. So if.
08;01;33;18 – 08;01;28;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Someone is listening and knows exactly you’re talking about, I’m sorry, that sounds like a horrible thing.
08;01;28;23 – 08;01;16;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
To go through. You know, once you get past, you know, the the bowel evacuation like a lot of you start, such as things like, Oh, oh, but I’m alive.
08;01;14;00 – 08;01;06;09
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I just love it. I just love that you have an area of weakness, a kryptonite, if you will. You know, lightning is your body.
08;01;05;08 – 08;01;02;12
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Like, I don’t need electricity for running or.
08;01;02;12 – 08;01;01;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Only hit me real hard.
08;00;59;29 – 08;00;50;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But it was great because I just need provide a little bit more context to the things that were revealed to me through this lightning strike, right? So we did about it. It was almost two and a half hour workout as real fun.
08;00;50;01 – 08;00;36;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Just lots of fun movements, right? That’s what a strongman session is like picking everything up and moving it and setting it down. So we do that for two hours. Feeling good? Use this huge feast together, and then we’re working on the fence and I learn about the lightning striking.
08;00;36;01 – 08;00;16;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
When you go back inside, take your shirt off, you get struck essentially in the spine base’s neck. And as I do, you like second order effects. Like over time, it’s like, Oh yeah, for sure. It essentially removes my my ability to experience pain, so my pain thresholds weigh higher so I can just go forever and not stop
08;00;16;12 – 08;00;12;12
Ken, Jon & Aaron
. And like, I have to, you know, stop myself. And I was like, Oh, that’s nice to know.
08;00;09;22 – 09;59;53;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I remember for like two years when I first got here and I first across, I started to like, go, Oh, how do I get to do it at this moment of time or cross the decimates awesome place. By the way, if you ever get a chance to go for it, would you should, you know you don’t have
09;59;53;29 – 09;59;44;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
to do like one or two workouts a day, maybe two like the right intensity and purpose, and you’re going to get better. And you know what I do, and I said, No, I’m going to do it for a day or two.
09;59;44;08 – 09;59;28;21
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know, you be twice as fast and I’ll be just it doesn’t work like that. And that’s the point that I like sound a little bit. But yeah, it exists. But it takes so long to get to that exhaustion point where I just don’t want to move.
09;59;28;03 – 09;59;23;26
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s insane. I can’t remember the last time I had lactic acid build up. We can.
09;59;23;09 – 09;59;22;07
Ken, Jon & Aaron
See our superpower.
09;59;22;07 – 09;59;19;18
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Working for one little thing. Yeah, but yeah.
09;59;19;03 – 09;59;13;12
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But yeah. But also, you know, so I’m told that you also have medical conditions that you have to.
09;59;13;08 – 09;58;57;07
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Battle with, right? Yeah. So sickle cell anemia, if you don’t know what that is, essentially you’re between this threshold of like 0% sales, sickle shaped cells and upper limit of 42% arrest rest. Around 30 to 35% of the cells in my body make single shape.
09;58;57;06 – 09;58;41;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
What that means is they don’t carry oxygen pretty much at all. So I’m only working in like a 60% of my total capacity as far as oxygen carrying goes. And that leads to like rhabdomyolysis. You know what that is.
09;58;41;27 – 09;58;27;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That’s essentially when your body starts breaking up a protein in your muscle and using it as a fuel source and closing your kidneys. And pretty much said you in this weird sepsis and shock, then you can’t move. So I first found out that I was sickle cell anemia.
09;58;27;24 – 09;58;14;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I knew I had the treat for a while, but being here now to kind of look in the mirror and I was at my gym bullet cluster decimate and I had one of the open work I think was 19.3 nose.
09;58;13;14 – 09;57;59;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It was 20 20.1. It was Barclays and burpees and snatches 82 so matches or eight grand overhead and ten Caucasian versus the Colts in rounds 15 minutes. I can do that. I get to like round twelve and I’m like, I feel horrible.
09;57;57;08 – 09;57;39;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And I got through and finished, Well, I’m sorry. I got like, round, is it right? Like twelve minutes? Oh man, this is horrible. And my friend Toto’s, are you OK? I’m going to do this, or I finished and I run out towards the garage and he started to vomit and I was like, I can’t feel my legs
09;57;39;23 – 09;57;26;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
in excellent shape. And if you know what a Charley horse is, imagine that put on like steroids and full body strength, and I ended up going to maybe TMI. But this is how you know you get it if you go to the bathroom and it looks brown and you go.
09;57;25;20 – 09;57;14;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And I was like, Oh my gosh, this is happened to me. And that’s when I knew that it had happened to me in 2015. So I wash his David Garvin’s podcast. I hope he’s writing a book somewhere. Familiar?
09;57;14;00 – 09;57;00;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yes. Yeah, I was like, Oh, I can go to the white sands. And they have memorials at the time memorial. That’s more help this this race that they do ultramarathon 45 months. What I can do that like going really slow by 3036.
09;57;00;12 – 09;56;48;03
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I couldn’t film, so I was like, This is happening. And I kind of made me think back to only that time I did go to the hospital. The time for the ultra marathon. And I couldn’t walk and I got done.
09;56;47;27 – 09;56;33;28
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I had to be strapped to my shoulders and about 36 and I was like, I’m finishing. So I finished. I get to the chair with my. He’s a he’s a weird one in Fort Campbell, and he was like, You OK?
09;56;33;28 – 09;56;19;12
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’m like, girl, sat on the ground. That was a mistake. I should’ve kept walking because everything pulled. I looked like I was like swollen. Like, I look like upset. Pretty much. And I could not walk for four days before as I could not take a sip of mine.
09;56;17;12 – 09;56;12;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
So you can’t kill your legs and can’t take another step. What are you thinking at that.
09;56;12;27 – 09;55;59;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Point when you just land? At that point in my life, I was like, I think I broke my this season as a thing that I’ve been trying to do for years and coming from like basketball and the gymnastics stuff.
09;55;59;18 – 09;55;41;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And track and field is like, I’ve never felt this level of pain in my life. And just the thought process. Let me tell you this. Let me compartmentalize this and save it for later, because oh, I don’t I don’t know if you know, but getting grab do is miserable, and you can never forget that pain when it
09;55;41;15 – 09;55;31;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
happens again. You’re like, Oh, it’s happening. I need to go and get an I.V. or I need liquid opioids. Just go lay an ice, you know? So my thought process were you?
09;55;31;11 – 09;55;25;28
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I mean, this is a dumb question, but you’re like, Maybe I shouldn’t do this anymore? Yeah, no.
09;55;25;11 – 09;55;05;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
No, no, no. That’s not how that’s not how my brain saw it. No, no. I think John knows too. Like, we kind of like the same mindset. Once you experience something that’s that bad, there’s not much that can be worse than that.
09;55;05;07 – 09;54;45;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
If you if you kind of get where I’m coming from because I have done a lot of things athletically, I’ve done a lot of workouts, I’ve done a lot of life things. I didn’t work the other day and always catalog that pain and go to or go to that pain of cataloging that ultramarathon and go, Oh, it
09;54;45;27 – 09;54;40;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
really isn’t. It’s just what is your will allow you to do it? You know.
09;54;40;05 – 09;54;22;07
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s interesting because it’s so easy. Our minds are hard wired to override what we know logically for what we’re experiencing to Paul’s right. So if you’re in pain, your mind tries to trick you into thinking that you’re hitting something new like this is that it must be stopped.
09;54;21;18 – 09;54;08;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And that’s why it’s so powerful to pull on experiences in the past that were worse right to to override a diagnosis, something that’s worse. This is fine. And you just put it in context, but you know, it’s funny.
09;54;08;21 – 09;53;57;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Ellis reminds me, you can also imagine your help. Yeah. And we’ve talked and we’ve talked about this a fair amount, but it’s like, OK, I have moments of hell that I can use as a litmus test for how bad this is.
09;53;57;03 – 09;53;44;05
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I also have health that I’ve created in my mind to prepare myself for where my experiences have failed me so I can keep driving beyond, you know, in between those two things you can really start to, you know.
09;53;43;02 – 09;53;31;04
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Control your mind that you can go, Oh, this this thing that I’m experiencing right now is like, This is the thing that I tell all of my clients or I tell people in the gym they’ll see me doing a workout and they’ll come in to the clinic.
09;53;31;04 – 09;53;13;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’ll always, always do a Ophelia class, always step into a class of people because to two or three reasons. one is that it’s really hard training to vacuum in my garage and just being selfish. And your thoughts go to you and you’re like, Oh man, I can’t push as hard or I can push as hard, but it’s
09;53;13;13 – 09;52;55;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
no fun in that. There’s no rabbit to chase it. There’s no one chasing you. And the second thing is that like, it’s not like, but there is a big thing to be said for someone who is better than someone that someone else that volunteer their time and once who shared that pain and suffering with someone else.
09;52;55;05 – 09;52;42;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And the third thing is to give someone something to aspire to. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been in the gym. I do something crazy, like yesterday, a hazmat train, £80, and I was like, How was I to do that?
09;52;42;03 – 09;52;33;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I really didn’t understand what. I don’t understand the things I do from time to time. And so someone goes, Oh my gosh, I want to do this much, and I see ten or twelve people to tell me the same thing.
09;52;32;13 – 09;52;16;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And I go, Oh, I might be OK, but it’s more of the lines of, Hey, let me be there with these people and do these things and show them that ten minutes after you get out doing this thing, like you never did it, but you’re going to be fine.
09;52;16;01 – 09;52;05;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I was so messed up that ten minutes later, I’m gonna be sitting down on a tire. I’ll be sitting down a couple of my friends on a bench and the conversation muscles are. That’s what gives you the ability to push a little harder.
09;52;04;28 – 09;51;50;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Well, what’s good with that? You talked about how you need the context to kind of get a litmus test for where you are. That’s kind of the shadow side, too. Don’t compare yourself to others, right? Because when you’re pursuing something, comparing yourself to what society says, it’s normal.
09;51;50;13 – 09;51;36;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
What most people do use unhelpful, right? You need to be in this place where it’s like, No, I’m not better than I was yesterday. You can kind of blind yourself to everything else, but. But that’s like the first step of maturing in that thought process after a while.
09;51;35;28 – 09;51;23;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You do need to get litmus tests on. OK, I’ve been doing this for a while. For the last six months, I’ve been in a vacuum of my better than yesterday. Where am I compared to the rest? Not as a metric of do I shop, but just to kind of have a touch of reality.
09;51;23;05 – 09;51;15;03
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And that’s when you get with those people and you do what you do. Oh, I thought, I’m struggling and suffering here, but I’ve seen now it’s forget. Now, if I had to guess, that doesn’t mean that you lay off.
09;51;14;16 – 09;51;06;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, no. You know, yeah, it’s just confirmation of the work working. You keep at it. Back to my better than yesterday.
09;51;06;03 – 09;50;52;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, it’s just the pursuit of better that that’s literally it. That’s how I kind of live. My life is the pursuit of better. I don’t have to be great tomorrow, but eventually my betters will add up to me becoming great at something I love.
09;50;52;23 – 09;50;39;07
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s like a. Everyone underestimated overestimates what they can do a year, underestimate what they can do in a decade, right? I want to provide a bit more contextual quick as you can see any forward and you’re going to help fill the gaps.
09;50;39;06 – 09;50;23;04
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yes, because I only know the super high level, but you have eleven plus years military experience, right? You started as enlisted, then you went and earned your commission. You’re currently still serving active duty and choosing to transition the eleven year mark.
09;50;23;01 – 09;50;08;16
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, I do want to touch on that because most people find that very difficult. In fact, when you step right now in, that kind of takes us. Now that we’re doing all these different things, you’re doing all these different things that we get to dove into with your business and a few other things.
09;50;08;16 – 09;49;54;06
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But I think that’s a fun transition point and then anything that kind of. What is pulling that thread, right, because there’s logic that there are some big decisions you’ve made since the last eleven years, but you chose to drop your due to pick up a commission in pursuit.
09;49;53;29 – 09;49;36;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That’s why I realized that that I was smarter than the people I worked for, and I realized really quickly it was like I could do a better job than that person. Listen to not to stifle, but. I should be making the same actually no more.
09;49;33;17 – 09;49;16;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, it’s true. If you haven’t, if you haven’t served a bit of context there, there’s a running joke throughout the military branches that specifically young officers are dumb. You’ll hear it involves a lot better, more things like that, like the new of I butt of a lot of jokes.
09;49;15;26 – 09;48;52;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
There’s a reason for most of the stereotypes. So if you’re a constant. High performing individuals in any organization, you can sometimes feel spurned and angry at incompetence above you, especially if the position is clearly not earned in the way that or respected in the way that you think that’s pretty common right now.
09;48;52;17 – 09;48;37;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I just saying the same thing and not to because I like you said not to be disrespectful of those authorities, but at the same time, maybe privately you’re going, Hey, I think my future. Yes, beyond that. Yeah, that’s the ordinance you’re worth.
09;48;37;04 – 09;48;36;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Come on, man.
09;48;36;13 – 09;48;34;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’m assuming that.
09;48;34;12 – 09;48;34;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Was.
09;48;31;26 – 09;48;16;12
Ken, Jon & Aaron
The thing I wanted to ask because you’re right that in any organization, it’s not. It’s systemic in the military. And the reason I highlight that is because if you’re if you’re just jumping into this conversation, that can sound like conceited or something, but it’s if you understand the heart of it.
09;48;16;12 – 09;48;01;18
Ken, Jon & Aaron
If you’re a hardcore for any organization and you look at something that frustrates you as incompetent it, it should drive action and resolve those questions. Those frustrations that universal human trait of like this frustrates me. Why? Why are these guys in this position?
09;48;01;18 – 09;47;41;10
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I think I could do a better job. I think I could kind of more respect. You know, if all you do is they just sit and continue the cycle, then you’re just contributing to the problem. It’s the steps that you have to take to then change the equation, then take you from being arrogant to being someone who’s
09;47;41;10 – 09;47;32;16
Ken, Jon & Aaron
driven, who wants to make decisions, right? And that’s the can’t be your fault. And so here you are. You’re saying you’re frustrated by circumstances, you want more and you decide to pursue your mission.
09;47;32;09 – 09;47;19;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah. So what the case when I decided to sign up for I was in Korea at the time and my commander was like, Oh, I should do that. He was he was an aerospace engineer and he’s actually doing the XP program, this experimental pilot.
09;47;19;26 – 09;47;03;18
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Now, he’s probably the smartest man I know captain now. Major motivator. But yeah, he convinced me to do. I was like, There’s no way for that man. I’m like, I wasn’t perfect. I don’t have a perfect record. And I was like, Man, I messed up enough to like not be able to do that.
09;47;03;04 – 09;46;38;26
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You’d be surprised and I did it. And literally in June, June, the day that made the 24th of 2016. I got an email from the recruiting officer, Casey, and he was like, You got to like to do those like, you lied to me 2:00 in the morning, you know, waking up like, no way I checked the portal
09;46;38;26 – 09;46;24;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
. I was like, Yeah, you have an offer you can accept. And I was like, Oh man, this is crazy. I get to go to school for two years and works towards my retirement, not knowing it like that. But yeah, it was pretty eye-opening.
09;46;24;22 – 09;46;20;16
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You no longer theory at this point. Yes, not thinking about this. That’s really.
09;46;19;16 – 09;46;03;28
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Quite literally. I don’t give myself credit enough with many things that I do and I go, Oh my gosh, there is no way that I capable of doing that. And it happens. And you don’t realize until you try and you try fail, try to try to try to fail, try it.
09;46;03;28 – 09;45;54;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And eventually, that failure will come of a learning pattern. After about 1000 ways how to not make a lightbulb not found the right one way to make it. And I got you.
09;45;51;06 – 09;45;35;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I. But I’ve had lots of conversations about that where people, if they just stop and reflect for a moment, this is people that have pushed themselves, not, you know, we’re not talking about people who complaining and it’s stupid.
09;45;35;02 – 09;45;15;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Whether anything that is actually dreaming or telling everybody what they could be, they’ll do anything about it. I think about those who really have challenged themselves and they stop and they pause and they look back on a year ago or five years ago and look where you are right now, would you five years ago be right here
09;45;15;19 – 09;45;06;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
? And inevitably, you know, so much has changed so much. And I’ve pushed back the past so many thresholds that I didn’t even think that would be possible.
09;45;06;16 – 09;44;51;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I come from a town in Tennessee, and most of the people around there related to me, something that sharecropping community, there’s maybe 200 people in that whole town and I should have been a statistic, you know, X, Y and Z.
09;44;51;15 – 09;44;36;07
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Things should have happened to me, and I realized that I wasn’t throwing square bales of hay every summer. I was 18 years old, working a job at Sears in Memphis, Tennessee. Having having my son, I was 19 years old, still going to college, and I go, Man, those are some really terrible times.
09;44;36;07 – 09;44;20;12
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Like, I had a lot of times I woke up and was like, This my reality. When am I going to be subject forever? And the one thing I told myself, I didn’t want as much control of my life was, now come back to that point to get a little bit of control.
09;44;20;12 – 09;44;02;07
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But. Oh, man, I loved it. That kind of made it kind of made, it’s somewhere this isn’t like the last stop, but rather than go outside by car. But you know, it’s amazing what a little bit of like and I didn’t try that hard.
09;44;02;06 – 09;43;48;18
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That’s the crazy thing. Like, I’m I’m still not trying very hard and I want to try harder and see what happens and people go, Oh my gosh, a year of your life, you know that that’s so long and I don’t know dedicating one year of your life to something.
09;43;46;29 – 09;43;41;25
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You either get the result that you want in the end or you become a little bit better.
09;43;41;12 – 09;43;30;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
This that you said there. I didn’t try that hard, but she tried. And now you have a suspicion government that was 30% with a 50% loss.
09;43;30;08 – 09;43;17;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Exactly. Exactly. What could you do? Yeah, yeah. And that’s why I don’t. And. I never understood why I was successful with some of the things that I did, and I look back on the standpoint of going, Oh my gosh, you know, basketball, military?
09;43;17;01 – 09;43;04;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Well, I was I’m not good at basketball. Well, because my stupid self and dedicate the time and energy to do it. I go to sleep at night, you know, I didn’t go to sleep it and like, I’m supposed to show up to practice and, you know, kind of lack of a better term.
09;43;04;19 – 09;42;45;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Perhaps that’s a little bit, you know, didn’t really pay attention. And then, you know, I realized why I failed. And in a more serious note, I go back and I look at my son and I go, Buddy, if you really want something and you really want that bad, if you give 40% of your time to, it just
09;42;45;17 – 09;42;30;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
works. Any effort it’ll turn try to be something really good if you put three months into it, delivery work and delivery practice and go across this state. And I think I say that to you guys before the Pakistanis, you’re only as good as the thing you suck at the most.
09;42;29;08 – 09;42;13;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know, if you’re if you’re terrible at parties or be terrible at cycling the barbell with your terrible gymnastics, walking hands and things like that, it’s going to come up. You know, what’s going to happen is like golf the highest number, and it’s not the lowest score wins, the lowest point total at the end.
09;42;13;01 – 09;42;04;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And that’s what happens to you if anything happens in your life. You know, you’re only as good as the things you suck at how you do. one thing is how you do anything.
09;42;03;29 – 09;41;50;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Wow. How do you do one thing? That you do how you do anything? So you almost need to course challenge yourself with the thing that you don’t want to put the effort in to doing so that it will affect the other they almost like all ships, right?
09;41;50;05 – 09;41;36;28
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Asked about the fact that, yeah, and then all of a sudden you’re like, You’re great. Let’s let’s say you’re great at pull ups, but you hate burpees. It’s like, All right, well, there’s your mental challenge. Deal with that.
09;41;36;21 – 09;41;35;03
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And the other one will benefit many.
09;41;35;02 – 09;41;25;26
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, like, I’m not going to sit there and say my tummy pull ups is kind of like how my career is. When, you know, if I’m only as good as the thing I’m terrible at, I realized like I was horrible.
09;41;25;10 – 09;41;08;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And in the early stages of my career, I was horrible to take criticism. I just could not. I wouldn’t say it, but my face would show it like. Yeah, I know, right? My face would be like, Oh my god, I can’t believe you just told me that I need to fill in blank with this character trait.
09;41;08;13 – 09;40;54;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You need to improve. And I one day I just accepted. I once you know you’re right, sir. You know, I could do better. And that happened to say, but to be like Scooby Doo. And I was like, Yeah.
09;40;54;01 – 09;40;48;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And then I unpack that for a while and I realized, like my fallacy, not only as good as the things that I sucked at.
09;40;48;15 – 09;40;46;25
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You and your character.
09;40;46;24 – 09;40;29;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, character. Yeah, what I liked about that is you’re talking about character trait criticism right now, like, Hey, you’re not good at some menial tasks. It’s like, no, like, you are lacking character in this area, you’re deficient. Yeah, that is a that is a level of criticism.
09;40;29;26 – 09;40;19;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I think every rule, but I continuously strive to seek it out. one criticism like that. But like, you have to learn to want to accept it and then to seek it out, right? Because that’s like a tool to getting better.
09;40;19;07 – 09;40;04;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, it’s like, who? Who can I put in my life? Who has the courage and actual insight, right? Because those are the, you know, courage, insight and experience to educate Adobe say, Hey, you’re lacking character, you’re you’re.
09;40;04;00 – 09;39;52;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Deficient in both. You guys have been here. You’ve heard this before. You’re a product of the five people you saw the most time. Yep, that’s it. And you have your sons and your wife. You’re awesome people in person.
09;39;51;29 – 09;39;42;06
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I don’t know who you actually have your life, but I know you get jobs like Bam, there you go. You have somebody. Part of your life is make you just a little bit a little bit better every day.
09;39;41;13 – 09;39;41;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Right?
09;39;41;02 – 09;39;26;12
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, yeah. There’s this. There’s a lot on the line. I mean, when you when you surround yourself with people you love. You want to make sure that you’re getting better for them and and they need you to go out in the world and make those right relationships so you can bring back, bring back a better person every
09;39;26;12 – 09;39;21;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
single day. And so challenging weakness as it is, it has to be a daily habit.
09;39;21;13 – 09;39;20;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know.
09;39;20;00 – 09;39;04;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Once you get one life right and you have one opportunity to do something here. one, Why would you waste it like allowing by not pursuing to be comfortable? You know, watching more shows like wasting it away, you know?
09;39;03;22 – 09;39;02;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And why.
09;39;00;09 – 09;38;59;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Exactly?
09;38;59;15 – 09;38;43;16
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And this is like a personal thing. I I challenge myself and all the time. Like, Why did I? Why am I doing this thing that I know is wasting time? Why am I putting up 50% effort when I want to be up nights and like that takes a lot of introspective work when you eat, when you’re looking
09;38;43;16 – 09;38;37;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
at that because it’s like, what is causing these behaviors? You know, it’s not logic at all. That’s part of.
09;38;36;25 – 09;38;23;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It is you have to eat. Exactly. And I was listening to this TED talk Angela Duckworth, you never listen to her speak. Yet please do yourself a favor and listen to her speak and smile. He’s like Jesus. Yeah.
09;38;22;07 – 09;38;19;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, she talks about grit. Yes, it’s great.
09;38;19;25 – 09;38;05;26
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, like, I was going to ask the questions you answered. What was the biggest success given just any number of people and everyone rattled down a list like this? You know, hard work and dedication is great.
09;38;05;18 – 09;38;03;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It was really, yeah, consistently late.
09;38;03;14 – 09;37;48;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Like, that’s why I appreciate you guys talk as a name, because that is the term of success. If I’ve never seen this stuff because I look at where I came from and I’m not the smartest in the world in certain circles, I’m quite like my girlfriend’s circle in life.
09;37;47;29 – 09;37;25;25
Ken, Jon & Aaron
The fact that there is an aerospace engineer look through the pharmacies and doctors that she’s a doctor now, don’t you just kind of shut up and tell her in the corner a little boy, but they go, Oh my gosh, you can do all of these really unorthodox things that I’m like, Yeah, I can change my own oil
09;37;25;25 – 09;37;11;07
Ken, Jon & Aaron
. I can, you know, I can go, I’m grounded, grounded. Yeah, well, Philly plant stuff I wanted to. I can fix things on a house and it’s just like grit. When you get knocked down and you’re like, Oh my gosh, what do I do next?
09;37;10;26 – 09;36;56;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know, it’s OK to stay around for a little bit and go, Oh, we of things that led to this failure in itself. But it’s. It is a state down there, it’s just not. And when you do that, you it sounds kind of harsh, but you’re just a waste of space.
09;36;56;11 – 09;36;43;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, you’re wasting that and somebody else could have. There’s somebody out there that doesn’t have legs that wants to walk in. We complain about, I don’t want to run. So the towns that I complain about running, you know what I do, like you did last.
09;36;43;24 – 09;36;36;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I don’t get up and go to a few generals are running for you on the bikes for a while and to get that juice flowing again, that appreciation?
09;36;35;24 – 09;36;17;16
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Well, it’s that mental turning the switch, right? So last night, I was noticing that training to you, enjoying certain behaviors and comforts very small steps to justifying it, right? Oh, I can be a bit more comfortable and I can enjoy another drink, or I can enjoy another five minutes and beg for it ever.
09;36;17;16 – 09;36;04;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And last night or 10:00 tired and I was like, Oh, I’m ready to go to bed and waking up early. And I could kind of hear that like that acceptance of less seeping into my mind. And very honest.
09;36;04;24 – 09;35;50;06
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I got angry at myself, right? I was like, No, that’s not acceptable. That’s not what you’re sacrificing for. That’s something you’re working for. Is that if you die now, how are your boys going to remember exactly? They’re going to remember your weekend of having too much grilling a bit too much drinking, and that’s going to be their
09;35;50;06 – 09;35;38;05
Ken, Jon & Aaron
last may reduce acceptable. Is this what you want? And I got angry and I went out and I decide I’m going to do 1000 calories in the bike just for the mind, right? It had nothing to do with the body.
09;35;37;23 – 09;35;26;10
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And when a little bit further had some fun on it. But but the point is, like the second I woke up to what I was going through in that moment, right where I started to tolerate a lesser standard for myself.
09;35;25;28 – 09;35;15;28
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I had a choice and I knew, like you, I knew I had this choice in that moment where it’s like, OK, I have every reason in the world to get better every reason. It’s the logical thing to do.
09;35;15;28 – 09;35;03;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s the smart thing to do is, you know, I could justify it all day by saying, No, that’s not. It’s not that I need to go to bed. It’s what I was accepting if I chose to go to bed, but I had to put to death then and there before I woke up today.
09;35;02;09 – 09;35;02;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah.
09;35;01;15 – 09;34;48;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
There’s a that’s kind of how new has start starts with the death. You have to say this is going to die. It’s got to stop and then I want it, but I replace it with something better, healthier, stronger.
09;34;48;06 – 09;34;32;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yes. But to your point that it’s not going to be great tomorrow. Oh no, right? It’s a journey. And in as long as you can, you have as long as you get that, then you won’t quit because greatness will continue to just not happen every day.
09;34;31;23 – 09;34;26;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know, if I want to talk to you again.
09;34;25;23 – 09;34;06;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
What is it? Everything, everything that left is a product of what it does, right? And we see this all the time around. It’s like if if someone. Is successful once a product of 100 habits. If they’re unsuccessful or unhealthy, it’s a product of 100 habits, 99.9%.
09;34;06;02 – 09;34;01;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know, the habits feed and fuel you are just.
09;34;00;21 – 09;33;46;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s kind of funny that you do say that those habits and those products that was a study done by the University of Michigan, I think, and they interviewed a whole bunch of the Fortune 500 company CEOs and went, Wow, these people are successful.
09;33;45;17 – 09;33;32;16
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And they realized that it was one of function of discipline. And then they went even deeper and they went over. What is one thing you over? You bought that changed your life? You know, that changed the way that you do things.
09;33;32;07 – 09;33;23;09
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And it was kind of 50% spread of what was like a hybrid of live at home chef to make really good food. And another was, I bought a rower.
09;33;22;11 – 09;33;20;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I thought, I’m not even a rower.
09;33;20;04 – 09;33;03;28
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And, you know, good nutrition. So you’re taking care of the body when you take care of yourself and take care of the body, you do something for yourself that inhibits more discipline. Once you know, you’re probably a good reason for that is, Oh, I have good nutrition now.
09;33;03;28 – 09;32;50;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I can wake up earlier, you know, I know that like, I’m going to have a good meal and I’m going to keep us a few. Oh, I had this rower. I’m going to inhibit, you know, a response of suffering to myself or pain so that I realize the other things go my day aren’t really that bad because
09;32;50;00 – 09;32;40;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
most things we think are bad or bad, it’s just our mind going, Oh, I don’t know what’s going to happen, let me get anxious, you know? And and yeah, well.
09;32;40;03 – 09;32;17;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You’re so you’re point. As the second rower will say, Yeah, we’re not talking about visiting a nutritionist restaurant. We’re not talking about buying a gym membership and going tenaciously for a couple of weeks and then dropping out. They put someone inside their house as a statement of This is going to be a daily thing that’s going to
09;32;17;13 – 09;32;12;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
be a part of my life. I think of Simon Sinek to start with why I go, Yeah.
09;32;11;28 – 09;32;11;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That’s great.
09;32;11;00 – 09;31;54;16
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But he one of his is one of one of the things he does is you think of him as like, what a smart dude. And he’s so articulate and pumping out books. Well, the reason why he’s doing that is because he hires someone whose only job is to show up at his house at 8:00 and make sure
09;31;54;16 – 09;31;53;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
he’s writing a book.
09;31;53;07 – 09;31;51;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, just like, Hey, are you writing?
09;31;50;22 – 09;31;50;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Well.
09;31;50;00 – 09;31;46;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’m writing for that job. That’s beautiful.
09;31;46;28 – 09;31;29;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I just keep me on track. But it makes sense. And this is fun because we’re talking about bringing into our days the things that will make us better. And that is where the small being intentional on who you surround yourself is financial is so critical.
09;31;28;07 – 09;31;06;22
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s the ideas category while unnecessary endings country club. Yep. Rick Clark recommended that I’m actually reading it now, but it’s excellent. But the premise is resonating. What’s right? You have to learn the capability to say no to three main things which are good, but not as good as they should be things that are sick.
09;31;06;21 – 09;30;54;18
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You’re not going to get better or things that are dead and not contributing. And you look at the relationships that you look at their business. If you look at that, your behaviors and right. And then start cleaving away.
09;30;53;09 – 09;30;50;26
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Goodbye bodies real fruitful at the end of the day.
09;30;50;15 – 09;30;34;10
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Oh look, look, imagine, imagine if you just take the highest performing people, the people who demand the most of themselves and of you, right? The people who care deeply. Right? And that’s what you surround yourself with period and period.
09;30;33;25 – 09;30;27;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But what’s going to be different after six months of that versus whatever circumstances you’re now? I imagine a good bit.
09;30;26;14 – 09;30;05;10
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah. Yeah, a whole lot. I got a really good opportunity. Like it really forced an opportunity to get my first phone number and face time with him, you know, on like a monthly basis, almost. And the do is to be a year older than me is like the wisdom of the 65 year old man.
09;30;04;23 – 09;30;03;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And isn’t he the guy.
09;30;02;09 – 09;29;51;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Won five times in a row. Nobody’s ever been able to do that. You wonder why he’s done it? Let me tell you the secret of life or how he did it. He literally did not give way to temptation.
09;29;50;22 – 09;29;43;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
He had so he had so much discipline with everything he does, and he just doesn’t want to come in second.
09;29;42;03 – 09;29;40;18
Ken, Jon & Aaron
He’s like, That’s not ideal.
09;29;40;17 – 09;29;19;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That’s it. That’s I do like second place, the first loser in his mind. And he says something that stuck with me for four. It still stuck fishing today. He goes, If you go to sleep in water, a pill, maybe the high selling thing in the world for business professionals or people in athletic pursuits.
09;29;19;27 – 09;29;02;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
All that it’s like we didn’t have to sleep. Sleep would be the most expensive thing you buy in water, you know, and that goes to say that your body’s if you get one chance at it. For the people that have preexisting health conditions like, you know, thyroid disorders like that, my heart goes out for you.
09;29;02;23 – 09;28;49;22
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It really does. The people that don’t make a conscious decision to sit on the couch or not choose to do it, do a project that they could take the helm on to become better in their professional pursuits. Don’t do that.
09;28;49;21 – 09;28;33;26
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’m sorry, but you know, all the people listening do that thing that makes you feel uncomfortable. Do that thing you think will be pseudo painful. But here’s a little hint for you. It doesn’t last very long. You’re kind of just a little bit.
09;28;33;26 – 09;28;18;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
More in what you just said is the conscious decision to sit on the couch. Yeah, it’s a choice. People act crazy and confused when they look in the mirror or don’t like what they see, and all they’ve done is eat Cheetos cheese nibs and sat on a couch watching Netflix.
09;28;18;20 – 09;28;11;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I get this House foreign accounts. Will you do the 2020 Netflix?
09;28;11;22 – 09;27;57;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You’re know, everyone’s like, What am I going? It’s like, I don’t know why. Why is my career stagnating or my relationships? Why is everything saying about why am I isolating alone? Hey, here’s a truth. I didn’t feel isolated.
09;27;55;26 – 09;27;34;10
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I felt more connected to people because I tear down intentional, perceived I. My goals got better defined. I did more to pursue it daily. I am so grateful for the opportunity to have two feet to get to look at myself in a new perspective in the near, and I’m grateful that I made the choice to person, right
09;27;34;03 – 09;27;20;21
Ken, Jon & Aaron
? Because I hear all these people who are like, Oh, it’s so refreshing to see people again. I’m a crazy man. You could have seen people 2020. You could have figured out how to bring those intentional relationships, which were to breathe life into your soul near you during that time.
09;27;20;06 – 09;27;08;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You chose to take the outfit if you chose to. You chose to allow these circumstances not to allow you to provide the bare necessities you needed for us. That was a conscious decision.
09;27;08;14 – 09;26;52;05
Ken, Jon & Aaron
This happens in the sense of business ownership to, because, I think, 2020 to set a conversation with somebody about this yesterday and I think about what happened in 2020. We were told to to shut things down and people react in different ways.
09;26;52;05 – 09;26;41;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
A lot of people just complain about a lot of people just succeeded in everything they did when they had all these freedoms and opportunities to just change up the game to figure out how to still meet those needs.
09;26;41;01 – 09;26;31;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Get good at a crash. Read more Books looking a little more educated take some college classes online and if you have a masters 00 you certified in doing this, let me give you a piece.
09;26;30;25 – 09;26;24;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That’s right. You know, I can’t get high, but I can’t get to the the bench that they can’t push. I mean, come on, there’s always a solution.
09;26;24;19 – 09;26;15;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I got better over code. Yeah, than any other time I’ve ever had a two dumbbells at a bar going to like two at a time of the weights in a box. Yep, that’s it.
09;26;15;01 – 09;25;57;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Right into your account and did this and did just because I can already hear your people freaking out, right? I’m not saying, don’t say, I’m not saying ignore the guidelines for for Kobe to do what is right, but don’t give yourself enough and get it responsible.
09;25;56;27 – 09;25;50;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, but like you can pick up the phone. Yes, don’t give yourself enough. There’s no outs. Period. That’s the bottom.
09;25;50;20 – 09;25;39;22
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Line is there’s always a solution to this. To me, this is a new challenge to get more creative. And it’s actually more rewarding because it’s like, Hey, I still do this. It means everything shuts down around. They’ll find a way.
09;25;39;21 – 09;25;21;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But the core of what we’re talking about right now, gentlemen, is a one term radical acceptance in radically accepting reality for what it is and realizing what you can and cannot control. And when you realize what you can and cannot control, all the stuff you can’t control or you can’t, cannot control, you throw it to the wayside
09;25;21;11 – 09;25;07;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
and you go, it is what it is. Serenity, prayer. You just move on with it. The things you can control and you can make a game plan for the anxiety depression all of a sudden kind of go away and a really big portion of radical acceptance.
09;25;07;17 – 09;24;51;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And I’ve been reading about it and, you know, going to group therapy sessions and kind of learning because if you didn’t know I had PTSD and it is a is a monster of pain, pain isn’t necessary for growth and pain is a necessary evil.
09;24;51;12 – 09;24;36;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You can’t live a life with no, it’s going to happen, whether you do it on your own or you or you believe it’s because introduced from the outside stimulus and you will you will go through some misery like misery is necessary as well.
09;24;36;03 – 09;24;18;05
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Now, the conscious choice to stay miserable, this is something that you should not do, which is suffer. You get in this repetitious, mind boggling circle of back to misery, back to suffering back to back of suffering. But you should suffer a little bit, but you shouldn’t suffer 24-7 a bad breakup.
09;24;17;29 – 09;24;06;10
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You should feel pain from that and realize that I contribute to that breakup. Yeah, that I can choose. That I divorce. Yes or no. Fill in the blank and you know, OK, I’m miserable for a little bit. Everybody goes to that.
09;24;06;10 – 09;23;53;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Oh my god, what was the, you know, I feel terrible. This person’s like the only person in the world for me or I lost the competition, the competition. Well, because, you know, I cut corners. I did the things that I thought I knew I shouldn’t have done.
09;23;53;14 – 09;23;40;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I really let our shrink or our partners. And, you know, then you go to suffering, you should suffer a little bit, you know, no, you should go through that phase of life. Oh my God, I to, you know, not kill myself.
09;23;40;12 – 09;23;29;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And I want to just be I want to not exist for a little bit. Okay, cool. You get a day of that. And when you get to that cycle and you get to the other side, you become a different human being.
09;23;28;13 – 09;23;14;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Sabine Marceau in the ABC, the head media guy across the state who is one of my good friend and we talk on a very constant basis. And he was the guy that had it all the media for CrossFit, for the games and everything from years and years and years.
09;23;13;18 – 09;23;01;25
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And he told me something was a heartbreak is necessary for growth like that crap is necessary. And what he was saying was a pain is necessary to build up the grit and determination to do certain things.
09;23;00;20 – 09;22;44;12
Ken, Jon & Aaron
So I fully agree with that right in and. The difference in radical acceptance is you just described it as a radically accepting the reality that your face is going to be pain, there’s going to be deceit, you’re not choosing to allow that pain to become your identity.
09;22;44;10 – 09;22;34;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yes, that’s the differentiating factor. And what you just described, remind me and Eric, please remind me because I don’t remember the specifics of one to three hours for dealing with grief and loss.
09;22;33;29 – 09;22;26;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Oh yeah, I just heard this this last week. It was it was. Let it out, let it last.
09;22;25;23 – 09;22;24;26
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And let it.
09;22;24;26 – 09;22;20;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Go and let it. Yeah, yeah. Let me let it say, let it go. Yeah, there’s.
09;22;20;24 – 09;22;18;03
Ken, Jon & Aaron
A book called Let It Go. That is really amazing.
09;22;17;24 – 09;22;03;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah. So, you know, that’s OK. Yeah, yeah. And I it was just an incredible visit on. Yeah. Of course, pain is necessary as part of its part of life. But there’s a way to do it in a healthy way.
09;22;03;29 – 09;21;53;06
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You kind of go, OK, yeah, it’s pain call for, as you call it, radical acceptance, right? This is pain. This is this is what I’m experiencing right now. I’m not going to run away from it and it’s going to look at it.
09;21;53;06 – 09;21;46;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’m going to deal with it, let it last as long as it needs to be my teacher, and then I’m going to stop letting it be my identity. So.
09;21;46;00 – 09;21;28;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, it’s kind of like I’m going to be solved and I go 50 calories, 40 calories, 30, 20, ten, 20, 30, 40, 50, and I go back, I go down the ladder, back up the ladder, you rest one to one, and something I do tell myself is like, it’s going to hurt, but it’s going to be.
09;21;28;27 – 09;21;15;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s going to be uncomfortable for a while like this. Is this your reality? Except to keep moving on? They have two choices. You can, you know, halfway do it and not you get no benefit from you. Like, I’ve wasted 25 minutes of my time doing this thing.
09;21;15;18 – 09;20;54;03
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Or you can push yourself to a point that you find something new out about yourself and you become a different level of human being. And the saying that goes with that is you suffer now and live forever. As a champion, Macerated told me that he say this is like suffer now and forever live, you know, as a
09;20;54;03 – 09;20;36;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
champion. And when you look at yourself in that workout or in that, you know that business meeting or that experience in your life, whatever it may be. And will you sit there and consciously go, OK, did I give 100,000 million percent of what I had to do this thing?
09;20;36;02 – 09;20;22;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Or did I kind of leave something on the table? You know, did I leave something unsaid or undone? And if this answers the latter? Tied, the shark group, tried again, you know, because you essentially did say a little bit.
09;20;21;15 – 09;20;06;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
The goal, right? So I’ve been really working on to surround myself with kids and back to that, but that’s now involved because there is only so much control and you control yourself with this availability and how much time you spent.
09;20;06;14 – 09;19;49;26
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And that’s what things what experiences can I continue to create in my life that also inspire the same level of growth and drive, right? I mean, that’s one of the reasons we’re sitting here having conversations with the group theorists like, Oh, this is something that’s making you better every time we get it, preparing for it.
09;19;49;13 – 09;19;39;05
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know, all these things, these then the restrictions, they come at a cost like I was up late last night setting this up, you know, all those things, but that burden is freeing me.
09;19;38;26 – 09;19;38;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, the discipline.
09;19;38;00 – 09;19;37;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, it’s should.
09;19;37;00 – 09;19;36;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Be to of everything.
09;19;35;29 – 09;19;13;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Exactly. But I think that there’s this fear that if you take on responsibility and you take up late, that it’s going to constraining. But I genuinely believe that the more good. Responsibility, because the more beneficial responsible you pick ups, the better we set, the more free and capable you become.
09;19;13;12 – 09;19;01;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I mean, I’m at this point right now where I am continuously looking for ways to further challenge myself. I’m not special, but I’m looking for ways because I know I’m leaving a lot on the table and that’s the thing that’s keeping at night.
09;19;01;29 – 09;18;58;04
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’m terrified to meet who I could have become on my desk.
09;18;55;26 – 09;18;37;04
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Will love it back, you said. And because that’s what I want to do something. So when I when I get old and I can’t do it anymore, all my kids, they go, Oh, that that thing. You know, Ben Bergeron wrote a book Chasing Excellence, and I’ve written like three times and he said something and that is pretty
09;18;37;04 – 09;18;23;22
Ken, Jon & Aaron
wild. He goes, cowers and champions have the same fear. The only thing that makes a different outcome is how they how they attack them. If I’m a coward and I’m attacking something, you know, I’m choosing to do something about something.
09;18;23;22 – 09;18;14;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’m not giving it my full brainpower or body or effort. But if I’m, you know, if I think I’m a champion, I think that I am, I’m going to go into like full force and maybe think.
09;18;12;29 – 09;18;09;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
What bravery is in the absence of fear to actually fight. Yeah, right.
09;18;09;11 – 09;18;07;22
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Exactly, yeah.
09;18;07;00 – 09;17;49;05
Ken, Jon & Aaron
If you’re not scared, there’s something about you. Like most people, here are the ones who have and, you know, going back to the trauma and healing thing, the things that have broken me the most I’ve had to heal through are the things that I was unprepared for.
09;17;48;10 – 09;17;31;21
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Typically, naivete, I don’t think that’s such a dark thing happen. You know, I had a cheery, rose colored view of the world. I thought I controlled it right? And it was one of those things I couldn’t control. And in between then I wouldn’t dress in between those three things.
09;17;31;21 – 09;17;22;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That is what a lot of my previous demons and pain came from. And going to the radical acceptance, I love that because it reminds me of extreme ownership.
09;17;22;11 – 09;17;21;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Right? Yeah, exactly.
09;17;21;13 – 09;17;09;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Same thing it is, but I think it is the precursor, right? You first have to radically set, you have to assess the circumstances and then choose, no matter what, to accept the logical response of what can I do and what can I not?
09;17;08;15 – 09;16;51;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And then you have to own that choice and letting go of that which you cannot control and then action that which you can. And for me, when I when I looked at some things and I realized I control this, this is why I didn’t control and I chose to make the second third order decisions.
09;16;51;27 – 09;16;48;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Based on that, it change how I exist. Yeah.
09;16;47;21 – 09;16;33;03
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Exactly. I just is your Muslim I 2013 2014 deployment and I lost a really good friend of mine. Terry Gordon, died in a helicopter crash. And the crazy story is that like I was supposed to be on the helicopter is a family decision.
09;16;32;28 – 09;16;21;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Just like grandma. I’ll see you later when you get back. We spent recent days together and everything. And so long as I was still about it, I think it maybe it was like two months ago, I finally let it go.
09;16;20;14 – 09;16;10;05
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know, I finally was like, OK, this is what I couldn’t control. You know, I had other stuff to do back it. So, you know, this is why he’s not here. So does it make the pain and the lesser?
09;16;09;23 – 09;15;55;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But I’d rather accepted that was happening, that that happened. And these are the things that I did or was able to control and what time that I spent with him was invaluable. Yeah. You know, we would. We made a mix of basketball and we play basketball in recent days.
09;15;55;08 – 09;15;42;22
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know, Game of Thrones came out, we got email mail to us and we kind of washed an episode a day and like, All right. By the time you’re done with aplomb, it will be like every episode was like, Oh, like 25 episodes in an hour.
09;15;42;21 – 09;15;29;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Catches up like season two. And then we’ll talk about it when we get back every weekend to watch it. But yeah, like like that, that type of. That is why I think I am the most grateful for my military experience.
09;15;27;06 – 09;15;12;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Unfortunately, like people die people, you know, you cause the death of people. You have a conflict. Sometimes you know you either isn’t, it is either you or them. And that was a hard choice to make it 23, 24 years old.
09;15;12;05 – 09;14;52;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That’s a big burden on your shoulders. But I think that that kind of sets you aside from the general population. You know, we understand what violence is, and we understand the cast their ballots, whereas you have some people, they go, Oh, we hit the ground and you don’t, you don’t know.
09;14;52;02 – 09;14;32;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Once you open Pandora’s box, it’s hard to close that thing because there are so many other things that happen in regard to that that are secondary effects like depression or PTSD, anxiety, you know, nightmares, etc., etc. You know, just because I’m just happy person, I have this heavy persona doesn’t mean that, you know, people are still, you
09;14;32;20 – 09;14;21;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
know, doing the demons in their own right. You know, we forget is sometimes what people actually do with this close to the is that being you might say or do pushes them over culture.
09;14;21;09 – 09;14;16;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And like you just said, there’s nothing special. No, it’s just understanding. Yeah, it’s understanding. Yeah.
09;14;15;22 – 09;13;59;04
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Go ahead. Yeah. Well, I to sign on to this one second, because we need sentimentality. I mean, the comfort in being lazy is a luxury of those who are being protected by those who are not doing those things.
09;13;58;25 – 09;13;44;16
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And if that, you know, the freedom is personal, it’s also purchased in people who know how to deal with some demons and some PTSD. Some things that they went through hell for other people to have those protections. So.
09;13;44;02 – 09;13;39;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But then in hopes that they too will find a way.
09;13;39;24 – 09;13;37;21
Ken, Jon & Aaron
To get that too. Yeah, that’s.
09;13;37;21 – 09;13;20;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
The whole thing, because the freedoms, purchase and blood is a visceral way. Right. It’s it’s in that way to try and select some information that you wake up and notice what your freedom is, consistently purchase and sacrifice your sacrifice for the living and those who have passion.
09;13;20;15 – 09;13;14;04
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And in principle, not just we’re not talking, just country, no politics or something like that. Nothing that wants a life.
09;13;14;04 – 09;13;13;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Is about life.
09;13;13;13 – 09;12;57;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And you just look at your family. You can have your living, your life, your life, your freedom. Financially, physically, mentally is 100% tied to the sacrifices you make to the decision yourself to live more free.
09;12;57;07 – 09;12;40;25
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah. Like I remember being in Afghanistan and being in RC East and being a stake, it’s I think it’s the wire now when you guys are right. I think so. Yeah, we we we had the greatest arbitration arbitrary before down for the Nationals.
09;12;39;28 – 09;12;26;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, there you would literally get shelled every single day. It was a blackout. That means that like at nighttime, there were no lights and no lights allowed to go to the bathroom in no time. Good luck. But remember where it was in the to move forward?
09;12;25;03 – 09;12;13;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But the luxury of being able to come here and do this podcast and not worry about over there, you know, zero, six, Adobe and more are going to follow the sky and hit me in the face today, you know?
09;12;13;23 – 09;12;01;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know, and here, you know, I don’t worry about that over there. I worry about that every day. I’m like, Oh crap, what is it? What’s going to happen today? And I remember we share it with that as a group, and if they would get their lawn chairs sit on top of the thing, and we had this
09;12;01;08 – 09;11;50;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
guy that shows kick people off of a mountain far, far away. You get a little closer and closer every day, and that’s Afghans who sit there and watch and steal stuff. one day he’s going to get it. one day he’s going to get it.
09;11;50;24 – 09;11;36;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
one day just thinking to really close my door and I’m like, Oh my God, what is that? He’s like, You might want to run because he’s getting close. You know, that’s the comical part about it. You know, we we kind of look at that from our normal American.
09;11;36;26 – 09;11;18;25
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know, this never had that experience, and we’re going to go you crazy. That is insane. That is unreal. There’s no way that happens. Yes, that did happen. That happens all the time over. There are some sad, sad person soldier just sitting on a mountain freezing right now and realize that he or she is doing that for
09;11;18;25 – 09;11;11;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
you to be able to go in and out and grab a cheeseburger and not worry about it, somebody’s going to say my country that.
09;11;10;19 – 09;10;57;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And then where and how terrible is it for us to say, Well, you don’t have to go do that. That’s that’s difficult. Like, why would you why would you put yourself in this situation? They will look like the chair will be empty.
09;10;57;11 – 09;10;55;26
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That’s why, yeah, if I don’t.
09;10;55;26 – 09;10;41;04
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Go, yeah, yeah. It’s very true. You know, you lose a friend or you lose a colleague in the army, in the military in general, and you go, Oh man, like, what? What do I do? But what happens next?
09;10;40;20 – 09;10;27;10
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know who feels that spot in? Yeah, there is a duty to do that is going to fill this spot for them, but it’s not the same as that person is still this. What’s before, and you know, and people lose sight of that, you know, the war in Afghanistan, the war in Iraq kind of got us to
09;10;27;10 – 09;10;16;21
Ken, Jon & Aaron
a point where, like the American public, generally when all this is protracted wars and all along that people forget, still people over there, you know, sacrifice a lot of sacrifice.
09;10;15;12 – 09;09;57;26
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And it’s while it’s huge because these things are purchased at a price growth that this country we live in purchase at price and really like you have to it’s very wise to understand what you’re going to try to tear down, right, but to fully learn and understand it before you do it.
09;09;57;22 – 09;09;48;22
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know, there’s this adage that you move into a new property and families there don’t tear down until you know, what’s it? Because otherwise you may find out what’s there and it could be trash.
09;09;47;24 – 09;09;45;06
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s like, it’s like.
09;09;44;28 – 09;09;31;26
Ken, Jon & Aaron
This wall seems so strange and helpful. You know, maybe, just maybe the wall is useless. But until you genuinely, genuinely understand it can genuinely grasp it, then leave it. Well, let’s understand it. Study.
09;09;31;12 – 09;09;12;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And in the end, let’s bring this back into the decent one piece of it. Like if our if our life is a house and the wall is identified as difficulty or pain and in our job and what we think in our life is I want to get rid of all difficulty and pain and Typekit.
09;09;12;16 – 09;09;08;07
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And then that wall, what you will find is tragedy. You will find that that they will.
09;09;08;07 – 09;08;54;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Not serve you. I wouldn’t change anything but terrible, terrible experiences, things where my home wouldn’t. I told you guys this morning like, Oh man, I’ll be here six or five. I told John yesterday, I’ll be there for 50.
09;08;54;16 – 09;08;41;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Oh yeah, I was in the I was in the Rystad this morning and I was like, Oh man, I need to do the three rounds up. And I was like, This eight minute round is going to be like hot, cold, cold was going to take me over like eight minutes.
09;08;41;19 – 09;08;25;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But then then as I sat in this trailer, Typekit six of the iPhone six or six, and I was like, Oh my gosh. But literally every morning I get up and I do three minutes and guys there, you know, and then I had coffee at Wareable and I make coffee in the garage with me, and then I
09;08;25;14 – 09;08;14;04
Ken, Jon & Aaron
start my training session for the first one. And if they’re like hard consecutive sessions that discipline going, OK, you need to give me the ice bear part of me big piece me is like, what can they call.
09;08;13;22 – 09;08;12;18
Ken, Jon & Aaron
99%, right?
09;08;12;18 – 09;07;59;06
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, like 99% of my little finger is the one going. You should do it. I want to do that. But yeah, doing this interesting to contrast my body for all the things that I do to myself on a daily basis.
09;07;58;21 – 09;07;46;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’m going to feel it tomorrow when I got gotten an ice bath. And my gosh, yeah, I need a building. I think I need to do. I need to do that. We can go face to face like 20, 40 bucks.
09;07;46;15 – 09;07;45;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Maybe the whole thing.
09;07;45;15 – 09;07;40;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Let’s do it. It was great. I know you’re all for basic principles.
09;07;39;29 – 09;07;38;22
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You got to see this piece.
09;07;36;19 – 09;07;36;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Of.
09;07;35;20 – 09;07;34;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
With a few.
09;07;34;27 – 09;07;24;18
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Times and it’s it’s not pleasant at all. But you know, it’s it burns. It burns the comfort right out of you.
09;07;24;14 – 09;07;09;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Oh, yeah, yeah, that’s about one thing I do a day or twice a day. Pretty much that reminds me of, Hey, you know, you don’t need to be comfortable all the time. You know, I maybe work out, but I work outside of not Air-Conditioned building, but a building that doesn’t get wet.
09;07;09;11 – 09;06;59;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know, I was doing Murph on Monday, and I was like, Is it going to rain? And it rained hard, like real bad out there in the office, and I had my shirt on at one point I to take my best.
09;06;59;16 – 09;06;47;12
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’ll take my shirt off to put the best back on this. Like I just made up 30 seconds, but I realized why I was doing it. I was like, OK, this dude passed away trying to do something just to make our lives so much better.
09;06;46;29 – 09;06;33;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Like, this is in remembrance of him. I can suffer for 3035 minutes. Nothing is 25, 42. So what? It took me like, Oh man, this is going to, you know, it’s not that bad. You know, in our perspective, you know, retrospect, thinking about.
09;06;33;29 – 09;06;31;04
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It, it’s my legs are working. Yeah, exactly. And I’ve been shot.
09;06;30;26 – 09;06;12;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, I like every year I would post like on Instagram what what I looked like when I was doing in the aftermath. I did do that this year and, you know, I didn’t do it on purpose because it’s more important to do things in remembrance of somebody and have it for yourself and keep that because no one
09;06;12;20 – 09;06;00;28
Ken, Jon & Aaron
else can have that thought that no one else can have that experience with you. And and I just looked at you, and it meant so much more to me. You know, I’ve been a whole lot because I think I’m a different person giving over to you.
09;05;59;21 – 09;05;43;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I became more comfortable with being by myself what I once was. Not that way, you know? Oh, it’s horrible being and not with another person. No, no, no. Learning to be yourself when you are enough and get over yourself.
09;05;41;16 – 09;05;32;07
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That’s good. So it was kind of meditative in essence, like it was inside the workout. But you’re also thinking about. What is this representative of?
09;05;31;25 – 09;05;13;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, and I didn’t feel anything, it was weird, I do mark a beautiful little crashes, burns so bad. But this year it didn’t hurt nearly. It really didn’t hurt at all. And I look back and I sat down on my driveway and it was still raining, and I just popped open a beer and I was like, OK
09;05;12;20 – 09;05;05;26
Ken, Jon & Aaron
. This is OK, I’m done. I’ve done this before and this this man that did so much for all of us, and I appreciate it.
09;05;04;29 – 09;04;51;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yes, I was sitting there like last night when I did this on. My part of that was because I celebrated Memorial Day in the memory of all who performed any sacrifice in remembrance of the far right and put myself in that mindset of appreciation.
09;04;51;29 – 09;04;39;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
So that’s one of the reasons. Also last night, I need to go in that right. I needed to make that right. And a similar experience. I didn’t make it about Memorial Day. I kept that for myself and going through that fight.
09;04;39;24 – 09;04;22;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
So when I did 1000 a couple months ago, I hit a wall I 600 in like this know different ways pain, because last night about 60, the entire 60 r.p.m. the entire time. So I just felt different. I was in a different mine space and I just I closed my eyes and appreciate the capability, the freedom of
09;04;22;20 – 09;04;19;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
it. You know what’s important to think?
09;04;18;18 – 09;04;04;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
We got a, I guess, a dozen staff moments a bit to like to realize you’re joining hands with a long, wonderful history of people who made those decisions.
09;04;04;09 – 09;04;04;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah.
09;04;03;21 – 09;03;54;18
Ken, Jon & Aaron
So if I want to, I want to, I’m not sure bring it back, but I want to tighten up our conversation a bit so we know where we’re at and then see where it takes us from there. Right.
09;03;54;08 – 09;03;41;21
Ken, Jon & Aaron
So we’ve just gone down a lot of paths and grateful was not derailed by any of them. There’s a lot of his time Typekit. You can really change the tone of the conversation, you know? And I’m just saying you’re grateful like, Well, we’re still here, most able minded.
09;03;41;21 – 09;03;25;09
Ken, Jon & Aaron
So it’s let’s party on. And you know, with this freedom, right? With these opportunities, with capability, you know, discipline, right? It’s like the matrix, do you want? I had a buddy reach out the other night. He’s like, Hey, can what can I do to detox and get a better shape?
09;03;24;27 – 09;03;14;07
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And I sent the name, I said the name of the Matrix Blue Pill or red pill. And he’s like, Which would you recommend as like, everyone wants the blue pill, but the red pills will work. He’s like, I’ll take the rifle.
09;03;14;07 – 09;03;01;28
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And then I was like, Okay. Discipline and consistency took a gallon of water day and do this again. Come back to me two weeks ago and he’s like, But that doesn’t sound like much, is it? Yeah. Discipline. Consistency isn’t sexy, but sure is effective, you know?
09;03;01;17 – 09;02;46;21
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah. So I hope he’s doing that. But who knows? But you know, we’re looking at all these situations that have, you know, all these decisions, all these things that have created you, right? You’re eleven years into your military career.
09;02;46;11 – 09;02;30;06
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Typically, that’s it’s past the halfway mark to the traditional retirement, right? nine more years you can retire. You have that the rest of your life, you’ll be young. Still. Why are you doing countercultural to that typical perspective and not just grinding out the next nine years?
09;02;30;06 – 09;02;25;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Why are you choosing now eleven years to walk slowly? Because you’re not being Gardner anything you know you’re going to fall for.
09;02;25;11 – 09;02;24;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know, thoughtful.
09;02;24;02 – 09;02;20;22
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Separation or separation, right?
09;02;20;14 – 09;02;08;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yes, it’s a mixture of things like, I don’t I don’t enjoy the ceremony to tell me one time is like, you wake up in the morning and you put on a uniform and you don’t enjoy it and you’re like, Oh, it’s time to quit.
09;02;08;09 – 09;01;50;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And I’ve been that way for like 30 years, and I just kept going because I thought, that’s what people wanted me to do. I thought, that’s what my kids want me to do. Funny story, my kids are eleven and three, my son is eleven, I’ve been around him consecutively for years as life goes sporadic like every month
09;01;50;06 – 09;01;32;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
, and that’s a lot of time to lose your children. And I realized that my kids are a gift and the biggest. The most important thing about life is how you spend it. You know, time is money. Be careful how you spend it, and I don’t want to spend.
09;01;32;17 – 09;01;17;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I think I’ve given a lot. I’ve given my fair share of time in service to my country and everybody else here. I’m not as healthy as I could be. You know, I got stationery for cards and fantastic, so I made me a thing was a big issue in those.
09;01;15;18 – 09;01;03;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That’s a lot of stress on my body, like the army’s extra stress, the pay is nice, but the extra stress isn’t worth it. And I have, in my later years of three years old was later years of being 30 years old.
09;01;03;11 – 09;00;40;25
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I just wasn’t happy. Hi, I’m like getting up in the morning because I’m transitioning right now, doing all the processing, etcetera, etcetera. I like getting up in the morning, have a routine and not being stymied by the fact that, you know, if you know, private snafu over here gets a DUI, I’ve got to come in and tell
09;00;40;04 – 09;00;25;26
Ken, Jon & Aaron
my B.S. why he got a DUI. And one of my favorite lines of that, I said, in front of someone or a little higher ranking than me, having to deal with somebody to have like a misconduct issue was he or she is standing right there.
09;00;25;00 – 09;00;12;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Ask them why they did it. And they looked at me like, Oh, like they didn’t think of this. And I’m like, I don’t know. I’m not a I’m not a babysitter. I’m an accountability. I’m a manager. Do accountability now.
09;00;11;28 – 09;00;01;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
If he or she chose not to tell me what they were doing that night, which their grown man or woman. That’s on them. If they do something dumb or stupid, they get in trouble, that’s on them. I just don’t like it.
09;00;00;20 – 10;59;48;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I don’t like the arbitrary rules. Set the bar that UCMJ. I just don’t agree with certain parts of it. You know, and the responsibility that we as leaders have over that person to choose to do right or wrong.
10;59;47;16 – 10;59;39;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Because lo and behold, this guy or gal does something crazy. You know, look at me like, it’s my fault because it is totally their fault.
10;59;37;23 – 10;59;33;11
Ken, Jon & Aaron
The decision since that time does not reflect my character, my kid.
10;59;32;22 – 10;59;22;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, yeah. But nine years seems really short, but it’s not. I used to be eleven more. I had to get eleven more because I’d make it to major. Then I had to get two years pass major to retire as a major.
10;59;21;26 – 10;59;17;21
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And that is a retirement point. Not happened. So yeah, no.
10;59;17;06 – 10;58;59;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’m good. nine years, it’s attacking. Yeah, that’s not how many thousands of gays and how many thousands of opportunities. If you if you need to change things, change gay or straight. It’s scary a little bit, but just do it and you made a comment and I’m going to be a little things that I’m not gonna cry.
10;58;58;22 – 10;58;43;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
So I’m going to be real because I think there’s a pattern. I hope this helps more than just me. You said children are against Rachel, and that’s true. And I said, when the selfish, stupid things and I believed it, I shouldn’t have said it to my wife the other day, we were just talking.
10;58;43;13 – 10;58;32;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
She wishes she we could have ten kids. And I was like, I love my children. I want to change it, but I could be completely content with zero. And I can’t go. I want to go back. No, it’s OK.
10;58;32;04 – 10;58;19;10
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I want to go back and not have it right. But I said that and and like part of it, if I’m being honest, part of that is a little true. It’s like, Oh yeah, how fun would it be just to have the unfettered freedom?
10;58;18;26 – 10;58;05;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But it’s so contrary to everything I believe and everything I’m creating myself. But that voice still lives there, and that’s why I wanted to share. It’s okay, like things can sound cheery and sharing a conversation with the same demons are in every person, right?
10;58;05;22 – 10;57;48;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
At least some of them are. And like that is the voice to put to death, right? That thought is what you kill in the night in yourself. You believe that a way you burn it off. And that’s one of the reasons I cited that mental section for myself was I hated the fact that even though it was
10;57;48;15 – 10;57;33;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
temporary with all this love and I wouldn’t change anything. The fact that that even came out shows that there are pieces inside myself that still need to die. And that is, you know, last night it was another step towards killing that so that I could breathe life into their gifts.
10;57;33;03 – 10;57;27;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
They’re the best thing that’s happened to me, and I’m going to create and invest in that. So anyway, that’s my own goal.
10;57;27;24 – 10;57;17;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But no. No, no, no, no. I go like, I’m going to play off of what you said. I’m more like, go off of it because the reason why I said what I said is, you know, choosing our gift.
10;57;16;07 – 10;57;01;22
Ken, Jon & Aaron
What did we do last week? That’s right. The entire time I was watching, you kids run around and do all these fun things and live life again. And you know what I did? It was like looking in a mirror because when I was five, six years old, 78, I was doing the same thing these kids are doing
10;57;01;15 – 10;56;48;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
. And what is that intrinsically? Is you living life again? Like, you’re living your whole life again through the body of this little bitty tiny human being that you’re like, Oh my god, why did you just the underneath the fire?
10;56;48;01 – 10;56;42;28
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I love you. Yeah. And you get the T-shirt, because that’s the tough part.
10;56;39;24 – 10;56;39;18
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Sorry.
10;56;38;29 – 10;56;26;04
Ken, Jon & Aaron
So but yeah, you get to teach them all these things and you get to try to rewrite history in a way. Yeah, and you’re giving the world this new product that you’re the manufacturer of that may make the biggest difference in the world.
10;56;26;00 – 10;56;10;21
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Brilliant. I think the where that comes from, sometimes you say I, if I didn’t have kids, I would have this little more freedom. What do you do with that you? They do pursue more comfortable things. Are you than even you could disguise an ability.
10;56;10;21 – 10;56;02;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s like, Well, I’ll get my business bigger and help more people. Or, like you say, I can look at a smaller version of myself, either a teacher or even.
10;56;02;01 – 10;55;50;15
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Still, it’s a lyric, because remember earlier I said that the more wholesome or beneficial responsibility take on the more people, because if I’m not building a bigger business now, what makes me think I do is find the fruit.
10;55;50;15 – 10;55;49;03
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Of your motive, your motivation.
10;55;48;03 – 10;55;32;19
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It is right in the sense that I was not on ensuring that just now is I had a like, if you hate it right now, you’re gone. You at least have, you know, twelve episodes. Maybe your kids could get a glimpse into how their father was singing about, like, what do I want to show, son?
10;55;32;18 – 10;55;20;02
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I say yes because if I was gone. Part of being a father is having hard conversations and looking at the past life. And I wanted them to, you know, they have their kids. If they are experiencing these things, I don’t want them to feel guilt entendres.
10;55;20;01 – 10;55;07;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Oh, that’s me being human. That’s kill the part I don’t like. And it’s like it’s part of do like so that they’re raising their kids. They can hear, Hey, this this struggle is normal, right? It’s hard being human, but now I can choose which part of myself I’m going to invest in.
10;55;07;13 – 10;55;02;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’m. And choose to see my children, you have to invest in them and find joy in them.
10;55;02;00 – 10;54;45;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
So that there’s like eleven years left, people say the same thing they do. It’s like eleven years later, you know, it’s actually eleven, et cetera, et cetera. And I respond to ask them, is why did you join? And they have the same look at like what?
10;54;45;07 – 10;54;25;28
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And you know, it may be ten, nine, eleven years more. But at what cost? Because I’m walking away with a whole bunch of scars you don’t see, like so many things that people don’t see inside of me, they don’t understand, like the nights that I sit up from nightmares or, you know, or that, you know, I’m going
10;54;25;28 – 10;54;12;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
to be vulnerable to suicidal thoughts. Like, there’s a reason why I do group therapy now because I feel super duper suicidal. I had four months ago and it just comes in waves and it’s like there’s no level of medication that can totally fix that.
10;54;12;17 – 10;53;56;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s kind of like who you surround yourself with. And do they bring you genuine joy and freedom? And why are you here? The question is why? Why do you exist? And people have those weak parts as strong as I am, like if I could claim for and five pound probably put it on my head.
10;53;56;23 – 10;53;35;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But you know, when I’m sitting there in no time trying to fall asleep or I do fall asleep and wake up from a bad nightmare, how much of my willpower, my mental strength is there? You know, the 90% error I realized a while ago that until you have the mental aspect down pat and at least at 60%
10;53;35;09 – 10;53;17;09
Ken, Jon & Aaron
, the physical will never come. It will never come because you sit there and you doubt yourself. That cable was not cable that I can tell you, without a doubt. The other weekend, I was at a house on Snapchat and he was like, Keep going up to 75 is like, Okay, cool.
10;53;16;28 – 10;53;05;06
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And I missed it, and I was like, You know what? No, I can do that. And I take a one minute break and I do it. And he’s like, Oh, no, you do. I’m jumps to 85 just to 85.
10;53;05;06 – 10;52;50;12
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Missed it. And I’m sure in his whole life and back of my head, I’m like, I can’t do this like this. I tried. And I sat there and nobody pressed and was like, You just keep pulling the pull like pull and use everything you have to cool.
10;52;49;15 – 10;52;35;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I go to the bar and like this way of like clarity rushed over me and I pull and I get it overhead and I’m like. Oh, Jesus. You know what, what is what is this? And it’s just that self-motivation negative self-talk.
10;52;34;29 – 10;52;23;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You can’t do that to you, so you can’t beat yourself up all day and night and hope for different results. So the definition of sanity keep doing the same thing over and over again. For over this reason, you can say, well.
10;52;22;21 – 10;52;13;00
Ken, Jon & Aaron
There’s a bouncer to Bush Walk alone right in that moment when you were down, you had put someone in your life and say, Get up, man, pull harder. Right?
10;52;12;29 – 10;52;07;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You needed a reset. Like, don’t just go back at it with the same mentality. Yeah, change it up.
10;52;07;17 – 10;51;51;21
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Now what is what is in your brain, right? Yeah, that’s good. We were doing the US Army War Team qualifiers, and I was doing them, and I was the first time I was like, Oh my gosh, OK, I’m trying to clean up and I’m trying to smash over 275 before that day.
10;51;51;21 – 10;51;35;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I never in my life next year, and I was in bills in December of last year, in November, and I woke up to the bar. For it’s like you can do, it is like you can do that, just like you told me some of the colorful words in the podcast.
10;51;35;11 – 10;51;26;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But he wishes some of my interviews like a lesser man and used it before. Why can’t you do it? So I walked to the bar bill and I was like, You’re funny.
10;51;25;15 – 10;51;25;07
Ken, Jon & Aaron
At.
10;51;25;07 – 10;51;07;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Work and all that. I got it. And then I went to go clean and jerk 355 and 55, and I was like, I’m going to redo this work out. And ended up clean and jerk and threw and 60,000 was like, Oh no, I am capable of so much more given, you know, the right people around me to
10;51;07;23 – 10;51;02;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
right support structure because it takes a village. It really does. three. The kids are in Beijing to raise an adult.
10;51;00;25 – 10;50;45;09
Ken, Jon & Aaron
To raise an adult. And let’s face it, the people who yourself are most important, not for when you’re in your strength, but when you’re in your weakness. Oh yeah, right now, when you’re in your strength and your surroundings are all like that, entire communities and their strength, glorious, beautiful, gorgeous things happen.
10;50;44;26 – 10;50;27;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But the value is when you’re weak and you have that strength, invest in you and then you get to reciprocate that into your body when they’re down, right? And then next thing you know, the human experience is over and would think that if you’re if you or your coach, let’s just look at friends, right?
10;50;27;15 – 10;50;15;04
Ken, Jon & Aaron
If you are being reflected by your five closest friends and then you also have a family. Now let’s start think about the second third order effects, right? So you’re affecting your friends and their effects, then you’re going home and you’re affecting your family, right?
10;50;14;27 – 10;49;59;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And then your families affected their closest friends. So and then and then the ripple continues and it continues to dilute the further way it is. But how I’m going to be with you, Erin, where you can and how you guys want me to be a better be right?
10;49;59;16 – 10;49;48;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s going to affect the quality of husband and father. And that’s going to affect the quality of human beings that they are in their circles, right? And that’s just a wild responsibility when you think about it that way.
10;49;48;05 – 10;49;34;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And it comes back to one of the things that I keep thinking about through these conversations and we sit, you know, we have so much opportunity, right? Like if you have kids, if you’re in a relationship, if you have physical capability in any walk of life, you just matter.
10;49;34;16 – 10;49;31;12
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You have so much opportunity wasted.
10;49;31;04 – 10;49;16;27
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, I went through all this therapy and I realized like, I wasn’t I wasn’t doing things the full potential that I had the ability to move into. And one of those things is not knowing what level of. It’s crazy.
10;49;16;27 – 10;49;05;03
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I didn’t know what love was like five months ago, and I started going to do like, OK and everything and have these conversations here in these people’s different life stories and going, Okay, that makes sense. And then, you know, talk and do the things.
10;49;04;21 – 10;48;50;05
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And I realized that I did not understand what love was. I don’t know what happiness was, and I thought that there were such things as good and bad emotions. And to that effect, no emotions, that no emotion is good.
10;48;49;19 – 10;48;33;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s just the thing that you feel your pain and happiness is the only emotion that does. It can be preexisting like. Sugar to it. It just does it, and it should. And would that happiness comes like love and you move towards love?
10;48;33;01 – 10;48;18;13
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And I realized in my life what I’m divorced. Everybody is, you know, there’s a vulnerability for you. But like I realized in that relationship, it wasn’t love. It was just toleration. Like a roommate and doing things, you know, to a certain degree.
10;48;18;03 – 10;47;59;22
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And I can say now that I’m like, I found love and I love my friends. You know, I love my family. I love my kids. I didn’t understand how involved. I want to be in my kids’ lives until I went through this like growth and transition point in my life and realized how much they meant to me
10;47;59;05 – 10;47;39;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
and how much everybody in my life meant to me. Because when I was in the lowest point, I think like three months ago, I was suicidal and I just drank and drank and drank, drive and drank in my Mac and Preston came to my house and stay there with me for 48 hours and crazy, and then took
10;47;39;17 – 10;47;25;18
Ken, Jon & Aaron
me to my therapist to have a conversation like that. All those people, those two people in my life and Jesse were my roommates, and those little people mean more to me. I mean, just as much to me as, you know, a blood relative.
10;47;24;20 – 10;47;13;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And they pulled me out a really messed up place, you know, and we all need to understand that we had those people in our lives on the East Coast grow those relationships, just grow them.
10;47;12;24 – 10;46;51;07
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I appreciate your vulnerability because I feel like you’re you’re only you’re only gaining as much traction in your life right now as far as your stories and challenges are. Because because it would be easy for you to come on and say yes, seven years ago, I had this tragedy and I’ve been on this journey and anyone who
10;46;51;07 – 10;46;46;16
Ken, Jon & Aaron
says that is in, they’re actually going. It is lying about all the values that were all.
10;46;46;16 – 10;46;45;20
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Along the way.
10;46;45;06 – 10;46;26;08
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And oftentimes with somebody like yourself is really thinking, How can I push myself? You really have to deal with some even deeper values that people are just going to screw because you’re familiar with, like dealing with this, what this feels like, this is difficult to do, and I have to address it.
10;46;26;03 – 10;46;25;12
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yeah, yeah.
10;46;25;06 – 10;46;08;05
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Because of the seven years of trials that we talked through so far, right? Leading up to the last couple of months, the differentiating factor that changed the game is the choice to push change, right? Yeah, the greatest. I think the hardest, most difficult demon to face is inside, right?
10;46;08;04 – 10;46;04;21
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Like the journey that’s most painful is going inside yourself.
10;46;04;09 – 10;45;50;05
Ken, Jon & Aaron
So as I said earlier, like learning about yourself and understanding self and I think understand myself way more or know yourself so much alike would know yourself. These people are great. I work for them a little bit well.
10;45;49;11 – 10;45;34;09
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But yeah, like know yourself and the hardest fight that you will fight is the one in your own mind, the six inches between your ears. It is very complicated. And until you understand who you are as a person, what drives you and what doesn’t drive you and what?
10;45;34;03 – 10;45;15;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
What makes John John? You will never grow. And I now understand what makes Tim Tebow and what motivates me and to essentially put myself in the positions where I feel the most vulnerable right now, football. And it’s fine with you guys.
10;45;15;23 – 10;45;01;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s OK. It’s going to be fine. And I know that you guys are going to judge me one way or the other because whatever experience I’m sharing right now, I’m in a seven year time that we just went over is going to help somebody out there doing this.
10;45;01;16 – 10;45;00;09
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That’s exactly right. Yeah.
10;44;59;27 – 10;44;49;06
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Like, you know, one problem that we have no one thing that happens in our life is unique to us. It’s not just you. It is a whole bunch of people. I remember talking to Matt Frazier and he was like, Yeah, I broke it back.
10;44;49;01 – 10;44;41;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
You know, I went through a bad breakup. You know, I felt the same way you feel right now, but you got to pull yourself out of this hole. It’s going to get better.
10;44;39;29 – 10;44;22;09
Ken, Jon & Aaron
There’s this differentiating factor, as well as the tragedy in some level, right? And each tragedy is tragic to the person. So it’s equally severe to each person. But when you can’t just remind, you cannot let the tragedy become your defining identity.
10;44;22;03 – 10;44;10;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
No, right? It is a it’s. It has to be addressed. You have to let it out. Let it last. Let it fade, right? But it shouldn’t be something that you’re talking about. You shouldn’t become a part of your identity.
10;44;10;12 – 10;44;04;24
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It should not. That is shameful. I don’t let it. Don’t let it rob you because we will.
10;44;04;14 – 10;44;02;01
Ken, Jon & Aaron
And you are who you are.
10;44;02;01 – 10;43;55;03
Ken, Jon & Aaron
The product of this thing happening after that I think doesn’t define you would help you become better to tell their stories. You can’t shoot this.
10;43;54;19 – 10;43;52;18
Ken, Jon & Aaron
This is such a nice moment.
10;43;51;07 – 10;43;49;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Like this is gonna suck.
10;43;49;17 – 10;43;46;21
Ken, Jon & Aaron
But I have to do this if I’m going to get better.
10;43;46;09 – 10;43;25;09
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I got to say this weekend’s battle royale and want to work out is a minute of a. Well, calorie bike, nine lateral bar burpees in six matches are 155 if you rest until the ten minute mark and then you do 40 acres and a bike is four times six and a half 40 calories than a 36 bar
10;43;25;02 – 10;43;14;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
ladder by burpees, then 24. And that’s what we decided as a partner workout. I looked at that and I was like, Oh my gosh, burpees are going to suck. That’s the only thing I I’m like, No, I don’t like.
10;43;13;16 – 10;42;59;29
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’m literally moving £224, you know, a bunch of times it was like walking that way every single time. It is miserable, but I look at it and go, Oh, this is like one of those moments where, you know, this is going to kind of help you define yourself.
10;42;59;19 – 10;42;44;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Are you going to like, you know, chicken out and kind of halfway do it and let Preston do all the burpees? Are you going to chip in a little faster? So yeah, it all kind of centers around. Are you going to suffer from it?
10;42;44;16 – 10;42;36;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Are you going to let it define you or you’re going to do something about it and become a better version tomorrow? Yeah, yeah, that’s right.
10;42;36;04 – 10;42;16;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That’s good. And thanks for being thanks for being the person who’s going to challenge and deal with this. As as we’ve talked about a soldier who is fighting the battle for us, sometimes we share these stories. We’re that soldier for somebody else like, Hey, listen to my story.
10;42;16;01 – 10;42;03;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
I’m on the journey on some things. I’m currently on a journey, some things I’ve already done, and I’ll tell you about how I had a victory there, but I will never rest. I still have to address weaknesses all the time.
10;42;03;14 – 10;41;56;16
Ken, Jon & Aaron
We all have in common, and we’re just trying to say, Hey, there is a way out. There is like, do not quit.
10;41;55;28 – 10;41;41;17
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Well, yeah, and thank you for coming today. I mean, the thing that jumps to my mind is we have to we have to work to live the example in pursuit of the success we desire, right to not waste our freedom, to not waste this beautiful gift called life.
10;41;41;16 – 10;41;25;05
Ken, Jon & Aaron
Yes. But at the same time, there has to be a point that there needs to be the time and place to assess and talk through the failures and the trials, right? And one, because it’s healing to the person who’s going through to future too.
10;41;25;02 – 10;41;08;16
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It’s encouraging to know the person you’ve seen as two and three, especially in an arena like this, this conversation someone could be driving home, avoiding some pain, some tragedy in their life, numb to it, going down a cycle of despair, not even fully weight to it in this thing to hit them right between the eyes.
10;41;08;16 – 10;41;04;21
Ken, Jon & Aaron
It help shorten that cycle helped him attain victory faster.
10;41;04;00 – 10;40;45;28
Ken, Jon & Aaron
If things get closer to the edge. Yeah, is one thing like to leave off with everybody listening is that you were worth something. You’re worth something. Your life is worth something. And intrinsically with your life being worth something, you’re capable of so much more than you think you only live up to 40% of your potential in your
10;40;45;28 – 10;40;25;23
Ken, Jon & Aaron
lifespan. So the 4% rule, you’re only 1040 percent go ahead and throw a 50 life is like a 7080. Now you may never get 100, but those things you did, they, John said, have a ripple effect. Just keep that positivity and all that good hard work and great going outside.
10;40;25;14 – 10;40;24;28
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That’s right.
10;40;23;27 – 10;40;20;14
Ken, Jon & Aaron
That’s right. That’s right. That’s right.
